I don't even know where to start!

The past two days have been very...hmm. quite eventful? If only my hormones would quit interfering with my memory!
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Firstly,Melanie's christening is being planned- Invitations should be here on Tuesday! Brett designed them (boy, am I lucky to have a husband who likes things to be as aesthetically pleasing as I do; This could pose as a problem,though- particularly, Melanie's wardrobe)... and Thank you Jesus Christ for blessing me with such wonderful Godmothers to my child who will BOTH be attending this event! <3
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Yesterday, I have to be honest, was quite frustrating. My creative juices have been itching to flow. I kept thinking about how much of a vision I have in creating arts and crafts-- ranging from photography,fashion, center pieces, poses...etc. etc. Brett and I were discussing what I could focus on aside from school and Melanie that could satisfy my "itch" for something more ( as if Melanie and School isn't enough to focus on- Hey, I know I'm insane!)..but there was always a part of me that always existed before my babies came into my life..it IS the part of me that wants/has the NEED to CREATE. (create--not procreate, I obviously have that down packed!)

If my own mother,my husband..my friends..could point out something I liked doing..it would definitely be "making things pretty"---crafts, scrap booking, fix-it, D.I.Y, fixing pictures...I LOVE IT ALL!

I've been working on photography ( hence our venture downtown)...and I don't know..I don't want to get ahead of myself..but I think I have a shot at photography? not so much the editing..that could always use improvement and of course I don't have the correct/necessary tools to make my images ultra fabulous/competitor worthy...what I'm talking about is having the creativity of directing shots..making ordinary pictures into something magnificent..

Aside from my creative arteries being clogged...the frustration came from wanting to start something,a business, in doing something that I love..and finding the balance in home life and school life. I'm still adjusting to Melanie's sporadic schedule ( she's a growing tot!) and my marriage. I love investing my time in perpetual happiness with Brett and in raising Melanie..She's the future. I feel like I would be a smidge selfish if I were to take time away from them to start on a business venture... I couldn't help but bury my face in Brett's shoulder and cry--I've always been an overachiever or at least strived to excel in everything I wanted to do.
I may not have time to start an aesthetic/ visionary company of my own but It's not just me now..I have a family and if I have to put things off to be with them so be it...

But hey- if only,if only- the start of something potentially spectacular were easy....having time to do everything is NOT impossible...it is just hard.- my mantra...
.....The hardships not faced may take the shine away from the trophy...In other words..what is the worth of my goal if I did not have any trouble trying to get it?

I'm going to go after that dream someday...who's says I'm not in the process to already...but right now?..I'm living my other dream..being a Mom and a wife- and that...that is something some people wait a lifetime to do. Blessed am I.
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Okay, On a lighter note...
quick little update:Melanie has started to take a liking to her Bassinet = peaceful nights for mommy and daddy. Oh, and the little bit has grown out of a lot of her sleepers!! she's finally out of "newborn" sizing and into 0-3 month clothing!
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It was Melanie's first mass today at St. John's! Hooray!!
As we walked up the steps to the large solid doors of the church, Brett asked me if we were sitting in the baby room or "cry" room if you must. My mind contemplated the answer to his question not even for a jiffy- "No, we're sitting in our normal seats today."...This was not said with a glimmer of pride, more so the hopefulness of a mother that her daughter may sleep during the mass...just as my siblings and my spouses siblings had done at their tender age of infancy. ( or so I've heard...y'know...sometimes Moms do lie!)
But soon enough...Brett and I found out for ourselves...As soon as we sauntered to our seating and made our pew friendly with our behinds.... Melanie, sweet baby girl, fell asleep. :).......and what was even better?..She awoke ever so sweetly at the end of the exiting procession...
...Thas' what I'm talk'n 'bout!

After mass, we spent time at my parent's house...I absolutely had to show them the hilarity of Melanie laughing in her bumbo.....for those of you unfamiliar with the bumbo...its a child sitter seat ( like above!)
....TO ALL OF OUR SURPRISE....as I try to put the shrimp in her seat...she puts her legs together and kicks off the chair ever so STRONG, almost jumping out of my hands...my apologies if you can't fathom the event..but LORDY ME, neither was I  nor were her spectators (My two brothers, my dad, and Brett--sorry mom you missed it! ) expecting her to become a jumping bean...She literally put her feet together as I lowered her into her seat and kicked off of it as she sensed it was close enough...never underestimate the brainpower of children....will power as well..she did not want to sit down!...We're all in trouble when she starts walking!

....ahh, and here...to the end of the longest blog known to man...
not to get all philosophical...
Dreams will always be within arms reach...for the origins linger in the heart..the blueprints linger in the mind...and the will power lingers in the soul.


-M